Rants, Ramblings and General Diary of Juliana Wathen

Posts tagged ‘humor’

Mornings SUCK!……

MORNING PERSON?…….NOT!!!!…Anyone who has ever met me will testify in open court that I am NOT , nor have I ever been, a “morning person”. You know the type. They spring out of bed with an annoyingly perky smile on their face and a obnoxiuos song in their heart. It would never occur to them to actually use a “SNOOZE” button on an alarm clock. NO, these are the people who can immediately jump up and start a load of laundry on their way out the door to the gym and make it back home in time to make the bed, have a shower and balance their check book all before the morning rush hour gets started. I HATE THEM. Just saying…..

I did, however, make an effort to join them this morning. I bought an $11.00 dollar alarm clock/radio at Target this weekend. Lord knows I haven’t had one of those in over 35 yrs. I’m  one of THOSE people who just get up when I’m supposed to but with my “Supposed” to time changing to make time to haul my fat ass downstairs to the gym in the morning I thought I better make the investment. I set my clock for 7:00AM….It went off and I hit the snooze button….typical…that’s what your supposed to do, right?…7:15AM…it goes off again.This time I let the radio play a classic rock song for a bit to wake me up and get me acclimated to the upright world. “Ughhhhhh this sucks”…..I’m thinking as I clutch my micro fiber body pillow closer to me. One song down and some ass hole commentator starts jibber jabbering about politics. He and his on-air sidekicks are trying to be funny and with a touch of Rock-Jock Shock humor….I found their slightly sanitized/riding on the edge of PC racial jokes utterly annoying. Instead of hitting the snooze button again, I just rolled my finger across the dial till I heard the soft melodic tones of elevator music. Aghhhhh better……Snuggle…..snuggle…….snoooooooooze……….

I awoke at 8:15AM….my usual time. I panicked and jumped to my feet, which is never pretty. I grabbed my bra, shorts and t-shirt, a cute pair of pink socks from the drawer and proceeded to get dressed. I ran to the couch to put on my new “tennis shoes for exercising”  and turned on the TV only to notice the time on the cable box 8:22AM….I did the math in my head….8:22 +3 minutes to find my earphones and head down stairs….35 minutes on the tread mill, 3 minutes back up stairs….15 minutes to shower and change for work topped with a 5 minute drive down the street to the office…..hmmmmmm. I am now officially 23 minutes late for work.

Obviously, this morning’s dry run didn’t work out. I skipped the gym, took the shower and opted for Special K with Strawberries for breakfast. I packed my Scooby Do lunch box, choked down a hand full of  prescription medications and headed out the door. I made it to work with a few minutes to spare.

Tomorrows plan…6:45AM wake up time…..better radio station and make it out the door to the gym by 7:15AM….It’s a goal….and a process.

BTW…..I lost 6 lbs last week…Yeah me!!!!

I love each and every one of you

Juliana

Copyright 2011 Juliana Wathen

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